My Journey to the Hill
My Journey to the Hill
As the C-130
military transport aircraft opens its ramps, I began to wonder if I am good enough
to lead. If this time, I will be of help and service to the people and make a
difference. It will be the last seven years of my tour of duty. Alas, the
Command and General Staff Course is over. Finally, in a few weeks, we will be
redeployed to our new unit assignments. Each of the recent graduates of this
coveted course prepares officers to take on the next step in their military
career. Some will be Department Heads, Medical Services to become Commanding
Officers or Head Military Nurse of station hospitals, while most will be
occupying the Battalion Commander position.
As I read through the orders given for our reassignments, I remembered
the years that have passed. It has
already been about 30 years when I entered the military as a Philippine
Military Academy cadet. Time has flown very fast that I am nearing the end of
my journey. By the year 2028, I will be retiring and going back to my
standpoint.
I feel
that I have wasted some of my time and was astray at some point. A leader with
no compass, no direction? Maybe not. Believe it or not, I am just starting my
journey but with a different perspective. A lens brought about by my Atenean
Educational experience. It was a dream come true because I can only see Ateneo
from Marikina at the top of the hill when I was a boy. Finally, I am on the hill,
and I can't help think of the number of times I was here to play basketball and
watch basketball clinics, for I could not afford to be in one. Only the rich
and elite can be in this school. I was only a kid living in a house near
Marikina River with a dream. But I was full of Hope as a kid, and that dream
has led me here. I have come in a full circle leading me to this point where
change has to be a part of my decision. Widening my horizon as opportunities
presents themselves and establishing new connections to broaden my
understanding of leadership in public service.
Fire for Effect, Follow Me
I have
always made tough decisions in near-death combat situations and pride myself on
being a simple yet effective leader because I always get the job done. I tried
to be honest to my men and always paint the picture of what we were in to make
them realize that failure would mean the death of the men next to him or the
annihilation of the entire platoon. They understood, so we trained and prepared
for the inevitable, the enemy. Things were easy at that time when I was a new
officer. They give the order. I plan, organize, execute, and go home safely,
with men alive. For seven years in the 75th Infantry Battalion
deployed in Cotabato, Sultan Kudarat, and Maguindanao. I never lost any battle,
and to top it all, I never lost any single soldier during my tour of duty in
this unit. Things were going well for me
as I was reassigned further up to Battalion HQ as operations officer and
intelligence officer later on. It was perfect until I decided I need to be more
than a soldier, a Scout Ranger.
There was
plenty of situation that I got entangled with because of being one. Culture expectation
and the last are my values. The culture and environment of the unit have made
me realize that they are of the next level and more professional and dedicated
to their job. I have worked with them once and despise their rowdiness whenever
they get drunk, but I see why they were like these from the balcony going down
the dance floor. I can somehow feel their anxiety of being in a unit like this
where expectations were high to the point of losing someone dear to them, their
fellow soldiers. This unit is their family now. It has brought them the unique
experience they all shared to the bones. I will respect that, and as their
leaders, I will not fail them because the care they have for each other is also
a manifestation that they also long for their family. Keeping them alive as we
train will increase their chance of survival. Slowly, I understand why they are
such rowdy drunks, but it will be a different challenge for me to handle their
problems. Somehow, the soldiers in this new unit are more active and proactive.
They may have gone on a drinking spree, but they will show up on time and ready
to go the next day of training. I thought I knew it all, but it appeared that I
need to learn more. As the days and months of training go on with this unit of
the Special Operations Command, I realized that there is a big difference in
the working environment compared to my previous one.
I
realized that my authority over them has little bearing on the amount of
respect I would be given. I was the new guy, and I have to prove that I am capable
of leading them. So trained harder and studied more on how tasks are done as
quick and as precise as possible. I tried to be an authentic leader to them,
which means that to be a good leader to them, I should be competent in the
leadership aspect and in the skills and knowledge of the operating environment
we are training for. I have seen these guys in action in one of the battles
with the Moro Islamic Liberation Front in Cotabato. What it took three months
for the entire Battalion to do, they only did it for a night. These men are the
best of the Army, and I should be or even more like them to get their full
respect. And I did, but at the cost of my career, I deliberately delayed an
advance order to get a better advantage over the enemy, which I did
successfully. Bringing them home alive was the only option but with great
sacrifices on their part. I was a leader, and I did it, but that last combat
operation was not entirely a success to the families of my soldiers who were
wounded in action. Some of them were severely injured, and some of them lost
something. I have told this story so many times, yet I am still asking myself
if I made the right choice. Recalling the situation and relating it to what I
have learned in class during a reflection paper was a choice between good and reasonable.
I chose the greater good for all but not of my men. Each night after the great
siege, I find myself crying for those I failed and for those family members in
shock of learning that their husbands and fathers have been wounded. It is PTSD that I am still dealing with today. I
have contemplated leaving the service, but it would only worsen if I did not
deal with it head-on. Giving support and taking care of the soldiers to get
proper care and recognition for their efforts has been my priority ever since.
Today I find this unit being given the support they need. It has been through a
lot, but I am proud that I was once a leader of a Light Reaction Company of the
Special Operations Command. "Fire for Effect, Follow me." This was my
final command as we assaulted the enemy defensive positions.
Leader
of Different Colors, Peacekeeper in Syria
I had an
opportunity to serve in the United Nations Disengagement Force located in
Syria. This unit is called the 1st Philippine Contingent for Golan
Heights. It was a very different environment for me as I needed to exercise
maximum restraint to deal with the local Syrians and Jews. They have been in
conflict for ages, as far as I can remember. My journey here started when I
found out there is a need for the Philippines to provide peacekeepers, so I
volunteered. I was chosen to lead a company of peacekeepers composed of Polish,
Austrians, Indians, Croatians, and Filipinos. While we were in the Philippines,
the job description provided was only to maintain the peace and prevent Syrians
and Jews from crossing the peace zone. The former consistently violates this, and
we have to patient in dealing with the Syrian because it was them who were at a
disadvantage. Not in the books that you can freely read is that Syria
originally was a vast country that extends to the border of the Kingdom of
Israel. The Sea of Galilee was theirs before, and it was their most significant
resource, water. As I see the situation from their lens, I realized that it was
similar to our position in the Philippines, where the story of Mindanao depend
on the narrative that the people made. In this case, we are like Israel, who
went in and claimed part of Mindanao as theirs.
As a leader in this situation, the real
challenge is understanding the conflicting party involved without openly taking
sides to maintain the status quo and avert another war that has already torn
the country apart. I believed the Syrians had the right to reclaim their land,
but I also thought that the Jews (Israel) also needs to protect their people
from harm. I am a public servant of the Philippines sent to Golan Heights, Syria.
As a public servant representing the country, regardless of my personal
opinion, I have to provide the services I am tasked to do, even if it is
against my belief. Remaining professional in dealing with both conflicting
parties should be my work ethics towards them to avoid taking sides.
For us Filipinos who are culturally
friendly to people, it would take some time to adjust. In fact, I told them to
watch their professional posture and avoid being openly friendly with both
parties. It was difficult for most. Hence, maintaining a professional posture
has always been a problem in the unit, especially for Filipinos. I consistently
report the UNDOF Group Commander's office for these violations because
conflicting parties are also observing and reporting us on both sides of the
peace zone. It was the same case for the other nationals under my command, but
ours has the most number of violaters that it threatened our stay there and
complete the tour of duty.
It may look ridiculous and straightforward,
but loneliness and the feeling of anxiety being away from their families for
too long have taken a toll on them. Most of these guys and even the
multinationals in the unit suffer from the same fate. But they already knew
what was needed, so there have been there for a while. In this instance, we
realized that we have to talk amongst ourselves and find solutions to problems
that somehow affect our effectiveness and efficiency. Our standard operating
procedure is already professional with dealing with the conflicting sides, and
sticking to that non-biased stand is critical for the mission's success.
Europeans, Indians, and Asians usually do not have a good working relationship
under one unit, but I must make it word. I have to harness their potentials.
Technically, they have their leaders with them, so having a good relationship
with them would somehow break down the ice to start working as a team.
Honestly, this leadership situation puts me into the full mode of being a
leader and a manager. That is. Leading the unit and managing the systems
already emplaced. Unlike a complete combat unit, this one is peacekeeping,
which makes decision-making technically challenging and has to adhere to both
parties' rules to avoid escalation to armed confrontation.
Follow the Leader, Or Else
At the
start of my military career, I have committed myself to the values of courage,
honor, and duty. I may have pursued a wrong path at times, but I did try to
take the right way to my most important values. It makes me question myself if
these values are all worth the trouble I badly experienced after I tried to be
courageous enough to stand and be confident that my recommendations are for the
good of my organization's security.
It was
the year 2012 when I told my commander that the Chinese were reading our mail
and knew everything we were running on our computers. It was just the aftermath
of the Bajo de Masinloc Standoff. I was the Communications Officer of Northern
Luzon Command (NOLCOM), and I have already been with the unit for two years.
Before this position, I had shown the quality of my work when I was the Finance
and Logistics Officer. It was my fondness for Information Technology that got
me to notice. Cybersecurity was one of my expertise. I wanted to capitalize on
this specialization, so I bought several books and attended cybersecurity
training to develop myself further as a Communications Officer.
This
commander asks me what is more important for a computer between an Automatic
Voltage Regulator and an Operating System. As an expert in my shop, I gave him
the best recommendation I wanted him to understand. But he keeps on insisting
that the AVR is the more critical for our computers to run. After the meeting,
I stopped pressing for the OS and the security implication on our daily operations
in the command because he already heard my best explanation and the need to
have a licensed operating system apart from the pirated operating system we
were using in the unit. It was for the best of my intention to give the
commander the answers for which he is not an expert. It was an eye-opener for
me the next day when his deputy called me and told me that I was relieved of my
duty and was asked to find another unit. I always asked myself if how I might
have offended him for speaking the truth and the actual situation. I can't help
but think if I was at fault. I followed my essential values and stuck to
them—my values of courage, honor, and duty.
It devastated me that I was relieved for that, and nobody stood up for
me. Shall I blindly follow a leader who is making the wrong decision? As his
staff, it was my duty to do my assignment before presenting a solution to a
problem. In my case, I took the initiative to seek out the problem and
carefully and deliberately planned for the solution. From day one, when I was assigned to the
position, I have managed to conduct a joint interoperability training between
the Army, Airforce, and the Navy to solve the communication problem between
major service units and even came out with a standard communications procedure
in case of an emergency. I did zoom out and zoomed in, but the commander's
attitude would not let anyone advise him on matters of importance. A commander
who does not listen will not be able to harness the potentials of those around
him. Is there such a thing as a commander's wisdom when it is clear that he has
prejudices against junior officers giving smart advice? He did not even have
the guts to tell me why I was being relieved, and his deputy did not know why I
was relieved." Follow the Leader, or Else." This was an example of a
commander who made it to the top.
Relating
from the leadership lessons I had in Ateneo School of Government, I learned
that public service is all about putting in the time, effort, and compassion in
my work. It is not every time that your work gets appreciated by superiors, and
it somehow affects the innovativeness of subordinate leaders.
Leaders and Followers, Parents Leads
Children
I was
lucky to have been assigned to Philippine Military Academy. I have expressed my
intention before, but it was negated because there was no vacancy at that time.
Believe it or not, I was assigned as the Commanding Officer of the PMA Marching
Band. It was funny at first, but the challenge of leading and managing this
group of people has made me realized that people do matter as they also have
their own life and family after their work was done for the day. When I was a
cadet here, I was amazed by their precision in marching while playing their
respective band instruments. The PMA Band has been adjudged as a Hall of Famer
of Bands in the AFP for some time. My task was to keep it that way and improve
its image even if they are already the best. But, the band instruments pieces
are already nearing their shelf life, and the music pieces were already
monotonous, and to top it all, the men and women of the PMA Band were getting
old.
I have
been a member of a Santo Nino Elementary School in Marikina. It was what I used
to bond with them during light moments. I showed them how I was thought, and we
all laughed at my experience, and slowly, I began knowing them, and then they
began trusting me. I was not an outsider anymore. Even though I did not have
the skill set they have, I have managed to let them know that I was there for
them and the unit to grow as competitions are getting better. In my
perspective, it was a matter of time before their fame will fade as the older
guys, the experienced ones, have already considered retiring, and these are the
best musician of their time.
Younger
generations of today are different. Even if their parents are the most
successful person in a community, most of these youngsters will not follow in
their parents' footsteps. Yes, being an engineer, a doctor, or even a lawyer is
an excellent career to pursue. But in reality, they will need money to pay for
the expenses in college.
Recruitment
was part of my plan, but I have to start with the band's family members. I was
encouraging them to first join the PMA Band Summer Clinic before considering
other enthusiasts. It was also an opportunity for me to inspire the students on
how being a band member helped me finished elementary and high school. I told
them about my story as a band drummer boy who later became a PMAer with his
father's help, who never gave up no matter what happens. I told them that I was
just like their father, who wanted a good life for their family, but it has to
start with a single step towards the dream. At first, the journey may feel
daunting, but the journey doesn't have to be a straight path going there. There
are doors that open and closes, and choosing the right one does not mean you
are already there because inside the room are more doors. Preparing before entering
is essential for what lies on the other side might not be what you expect them
to be.
Leadership
starts with the family. The parents are the leaders, and the children are their
followers. It is the most challenging leadership situation for others because
leading by example is not enough.
Mentoring Culture in the Military and
Beyond
I have
often wonder who my mentor was. Did I have a mentor or a coach? Or was I a
Mentor at one point? It was the reason why I started advocating for mentoring
while I was the Head of the Department of Leadership for two years. Coming from
the field, I knew that the new Philippine Military Academy graduates were ready
for combat leadership and competent. There is no question that they are the
cream of the crop. But what they lack is experience, and that is where it all
starts to crumble. I have been there, and for some, they failed to handle
themselves as they thought that being a leader is just a position. My
experience has taught me that leadership is about actively making choices that are
advantageous for the unit and the unit's mission. It was all about looking for
their welfare and accomplishing the task. You fail in one of these considers
you as a failure. It was as simple as that in the military before. But now it
has leveled up. Unfortunately, PMA did not adapt to the changes, although it
claimed it was the pioneer in military leadership in Southeast Asia before. The
world has changed. It is now a world of volatility, uncertainty, complexity,
and ambiguity. It is what we all know at present as the VUCA environment.
Technology and Geopolitical situations were some of the factors leading to this
environment. It is real and ever-changing.
I have
been teaching in PMA for almost a year, and I observed that the methods of
instruction are still the same as we were when I was a cadet. As the Department
Head, I tried to develop ways of more facilitative and student-centered
instruction than just lecture. I also advocated for others to be more a
facilitator rather than just be a lecturer. Some of the officers were not so
keen on doing this. Some were really enthusiastic about the idea, so we worked
on the program of instructions continuously and soon realized that it would not
last if a culture will not emerge from what we have. Mentoring culture is what
we wanted to be developed as a culture in the cadet community because, at that
time, it was all very structured, and you have to follow the chain of command
strictly. There was a problem there because not all cadets were given a chance
to lead teams, squads, platoons, and battalions. I realized it when I graduated.
All I have were theories and knowledge. I was not one of those who are
academically brilliant, but I believe I was a good leader. I also observed at
that time that those academically inclined cadets are not really into
leadership but for the fame and position that comes with it.
Developing a mentoring culture will take a long time, so I
planned and prepared for it. The first thing I did was have the Mentoring Program
approved by the command, and I successfully did it with annual funding. The
first batch was a challenge because it entails a lot of coordination and
preparation, but it was part of its birth pains. Finally, we have broken
through the usual system of developing leadership. The opportunities created even
in the simple things of coaching may have helped create the culture of
mentoring. It was already a part of the system giving a chance for other to experience
leadership.
And now, I realized that what I have done were just the Whats
and Hows of leadership. The question lingers in my mind whether the cadets
would find the Spirit in Leadership. There is more to be done, but I am not in
the position anymore to make improvements. My inner self tells me that I can
still do something on my end. I started it to advocate for a mentoring culture,
whether it be in Philippine Military Academy. My inner self tells me to go beyond,
and that is what I will do.
Bibliography
Shamir, B., &
Eilam, G. (2005). "What's your story?" A life-stories approach to
authentic leadership development. Leadership Quarterly, 16(3),
395-417. Retrieved 5 27, 2021, from https://sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/s1048984305000299
Souba, W. W. (2006).
The Inward Journey of Leadership. Journal of Surgical Research, 131(2),
159-167. Retrieved 5 27, 2021, from
https://geiselmed.dartmouth.edu/rhs/pdf/souba_inward_journey.pdf
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